I know. My posts have been few and far between of late. When I began this post 14 days ago, it nearly broke me. I had to walk away. I dug my heels into my fiction reading addiction and kept my nose buried there, refusing to think or write.
I’ve been remiss. I failed to share my wonderful margarita-filled Mothers Day. I failed to share my daughter’s first ballet recital and my first experience as a dance mom backstage. Worse, I failed to share my son’s one and only high school graduation. But I will share these amazing moments soon and that’s a promise.
My daughter kicked me in the panties last night. Let me tell you, my 4 year-old sounded like a 40 year-old and she really let me have it. Immediately after, she curled up on top of me, said a sleepy goodnight and quickly drifted off to sleep. And I cried. Because she was right. I had let her down and that’s something she’d never before experienced with me. After I finished my cry, and ate not one but two chocolate bars, I was finally inspired to pick up my beloved MacBook Air and write.
Life happens. Sometimes it sneaks up on us and gives a little tap on the shoulder. Sometimes it surprises us because we allow ourselves to practice denial. And then sometimes it actually slaps us across the face.
Ouch. I had my face slapped by life back in April when I received a letter from my husband’s attorney informing me there would be a divorce. Then I allowed myself to be bullied for the following few months. But don’t worry, I’ve since bucked up and reinstated my 2012 new year’s resolution—be fearless.
Sweetness of Life & Motherhood is not just about motherhood. It’s about womanhood. And for me, that includes motherhood and much more. So as I begin to process my thoughts on the present and look forward to the future, I’ll be publishing some posts that may not include mention of my darling children.
I will no longer be bullied. I won’t let my kids down. I will remove the chocolate bars from my nightstand. And I will write.